Sure, language is defined by usage. I use "sexual assault" to mean "sex without consent." So do many others, as a web search will show. Ergo, that's one of its definitions, and Stallman is wrong to say that his definition - which requires the use of force - is the only definition that matters, and therefore he cannot argue that any other definitional use is "absolutely wrong" (quoting him).
Re: I need a better understanding